


They call me Coffee

by LoveRoundWorld



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bad Jokes, Boys In Love, Coffee, Coffee Innuendos, Draco's Eavesdropping, Fluff, Funny, Harry forgets what he does when drunk, M/M, Meme's, Quiet Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2020-07-09 05:24:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19882357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveRoundWorld/pseuds/LoveRoundWorld
Summary: I got this idea from a meme I stumbled across. Coffee Squad.Basically, they all make coffee innuendo's (Blaise, Harry and Draco) Only, Draco's is "Because I'm dark and bitter and most people don't like me without changing some aspect of who I am."This is a fic of how Draco finds out that someone actually loves black coffee if it's him. ;)





	They call me Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> I'd like to again mention that this work is mostly due to reading a meme I found. I haven't the foggiest of who made the meme, so I can't properly credit them. However if you look this link up https://www.pinterest.com/pin/608056387163179682/?lp=true  
> It should be there. If not, just look up Coffee Squad Harry Potter in google. :D  
> (I also wanted to thank the person who came up with that.)
> 
> Comments are adored and precious to me! Leave em, please! They make my world go round! :3

The War was over. For that, many were relieved. Hermione herself was more than relieved-as it meant that her best friend was no longer constantly in danger. Although he hated all the attention that his new feat garnered him. The Boy Who Lived Twice. Her boyfriend was certainly enjoying the attention more than herself or Harry. Though-almost a year later-he was now starting to get how intrusive people were for famous people. 

Hermione is upstairs in the Eighth-year girls' dorm-her and many others returned to finish up their eighth year-when she hears laughter for the tenth time coming from down in the commons. Sighing, she casts a tempus. It’s late...She decides to go down and see what the group was doing-and who all was in the group still. (The eighth years had been celebrating Halloween together after the feast.) 

So, she starts down the stairs and raises a brow to see three swaying figures sitting around a long-forgotten bottle, laughing at bad jokes. They're very drunk, she notes. 

The tall dark-skinned boy grins and leans forward. “They call me coffee because I grind so fine.” He says with a wink. 

Hermione groans and pinkens a little in second hand embarrassment. “Oh my god.” 

Harry grins up at her from where he has a direct line of sight over the two former Slytherin’s. “They call me coffee because I keep you up past two a.m.” 

“Harry, not you too...” She sighs, debating whether she should just cast a silencing charm and leave them. 

“They call me coffee-” Draco starts. 

“Please, don’t!” Hermione tries to interject. 

“Because I’m dark and bitter and most people don’t like me without changing some aspect of who I am.” He says, a grimace on his face. 

“Oh.” Hermione says, a twinge of pity for the boy going through her. 

But then Harry is leaning over towards the sulking blonde boy and grabs his chin. He forces it up and gives him a goofy smile. ”I love black coffee. I wouldn’t change a thing about you.” He says, though his words slur just a little. And Hermione watches on as the pale boy flushes. Harry leans in and gives him a peck on the lips. When he pulls back, he gives a mischievous look. “Besides, I think you taste pretty sweet to me.” 

Hermione turns around and goes back up the stairs. Nope. She’s not dealing with this. She casts a silencing spell and simply falls to sleep in her bed. 

\--- 

Draco still remembers the night before. And so does Blaise. But it’s clear that Harry doesn’t. He’s acting like normal. For this year, at least. Draco and Harry had become friends since the start of the year. Amicable. Though sometimes they still traded insults, Harry was always grinning from ear to ear. With his stupid adorable green eyes flashing brightly. 

“Is it true you love plain, black coffee, Potter?” Blaise teases. Draco nearly pinkens and groans-if not for his father raising him in a strict pureblood upbringing. 

But Potter looks confused. “Uh...no? I mean, I’m fine with drinking it, but it’s not my favorite.” 

“But you said last night...” Draco mutters, confusion on his face now. 

“Did I? Weird. I like sour, but bitter isn’t really my thing with food and drinks.” He says with a shrug. Hermione rolls her eyes next to him. 

What the hell? Had Harry really just come onto him while drunk or something? He doesn’t even really like black coffee! Yet Draco knows that usually people are more honest when drunk than sober. 

“Well, you did say you keep people up past two a.m. and that people call you coffee for it.” Hermione huffs. 

Harry barks out a laugh. “I mean, I'm sure I made it sound sexual, but it’s true.” Hermione lifts a brow and Draco grumbles. Harry holds up a hand and starts lifting fingers. “That time in first year when I got you and Ron to sneak out to stop Tom-tom. Second year, me and Ron and the Chamber of Secrets, Third-year we were in bed by like one, so I guess that doesn’t count. But you get my meaning.” 

Hermione actually laughs at this, and Draco does too. Blaise merely rolls his eyes at the Gryffindor shenanigans. 

“Other than for heroics, I’ve never kept anyone up past two a.m.” 

\-- 

A few weeks later, Weasley (Draco has a friendship with Hermione and Harry, but seeing as Weasley decided to take up the offer of direct Auror training instead, he’s still wary of the man) visits from where he’s training to be an Auror. “My trainer is a snarky git.” 

Draco sees Harry shrug from where he is eavesdropping. He doesn’t know why he is-well, he does. But he’s not going to acknowledge it. “That doesn’t sound all that bad to me.” 

“But, Harry-” The red head whines. “No one likes a pompous snarky git!” 

And here Harry laughs and leans forward a little. “You happen to know that I love pompous snarky gits. Especially if their snark is actually funny.” 

“Ew!” Weasley grunts, throwing a pillow at his friend. 

Draco blinks. Harry Potter likes Snarky pompous people. Who knew? He leaves them to their conversation then. 

\-- 

He walks in on a conversation between Ginny and Harry next. “Right. I forgot your type is ‘taller than you and blonde.’” The Weaslette snarks. 

Harry gives her a blinding smile. “Can’t help if I love what I love.” He says with an unrepentant shoulder shrug. 

Blonde and taller. There aren’t many girls that are...well, actually a lot of girls are taller than Harry Potter. (Draco had been outraged when he’d found out about why that was-the malnourished state caused by his relatives.). Both people stop talking about it as soon as they seem him. Harry goes a little red but then he’s grinning. “Come to snark, Malfoy?” 

Draco finds it easy to grin back. “You wish, Potter.” He says in his best pompous voice. 

\-- 

He stumbles on a conversation that Harry is having with a younger year. Probably about third year. “There’s nothing wrong with liking blokes, Rogers.” He says in his kindest voice. Draco stops to give them some privacy. 

“Sure there is. Otherwise, I’d know at least one other guy, right?” The Third year Ravenclaw sniffles. 

“Well, so happens you do!” Harry responds with a grin. When the other boy looks with confusion, Potter points to himself. “Happens I love Blokes. Girls are fine I guess, but I’ve only ever liked blokes the way we’re talking.” 

“Really?” The boy sounds as equally as breathless as Draco. 

Harry nods. “And the only reason the Muggle world is so against it in the first place is because in the beginning they needed a way to have kids. Couldn’t encourage people who couldn’t. But here in the Wizarding world, it’s totally acceptable! There are potions that allow you to have kids-whether you’re two females or two guys. So, nothing to worry about. At least not here, yeah?” When the kid nods, Harry ruffles his hair and gets up. 

Draco turns and fleas. Mind racing. Harry Potter likes boys. He goes to Blaise. And he says this. “He likes boys.” 

“Yeah, that was obvious.” Blaise says. 

“What? Obvious? How?” Never mind Draco never even said who ‘he’ was. 

Blaise shrugs, but doesn't answer. Instead, he asks another question. “Any idea of what else he likes, Draco?” 

Draco, of course nods. “Snarky, intelligent, pompous, blonde, taller than him.” He lists.

“And what does that sound like?” When Draco gives him a confused look, Blaise sits up from his bed. “Who in the school would that describe?” 

Draco thinks for a moment. But he can’t think of anyone. He shrugs. 

“Draco...what color is your hair?” 

“Blonde.” Draco responds with a huff. They weren’t talking about him. They were talking about Harry! 

“Don’t you get high marks-just below Hermione in some cases?” 

“Yes.” 

“And we both know you’re Pompous and Snarky.” Blaise says, looking down at his nails nonchalantly. 

Draco almost asks what his point is, when it slams into him. He feels the breath leave him in a fell swoop. Oh. Oh. “You don't’ think...” 

“I think, when Drunk Harry said he liked black coffee, he was more going off of you referencing yourself as Black coffee, than actual coffee.” 

Draco stands up. “Right.” 

And he goes to find his friend Harry. When Harry answers the door, Draco blurts out “I like you. Will you go to Hogsmeade with me?” And Harry’s face lights up in delight and he nods. Draco’s face flushes a little, but then he grins too. 

\-- 

Harry kisses him at the end of their first date, too.


End file.
